Friday, June 8, 2018

Dee Eye Vee Oh Are See Ee

Have you ever met someone who raises their hand and says, “I’m so glad I went through a divorce!”
Me either...until now.
Let me be the first, but also let me rephrase it a bit.
I’m glad I went through a divorce, because of how much it taught me.

At the risk of sounding like a whack job, I can honesty say that I’m so happy for the experiences I went through. Granted, I highly caution against getting a divorce unless God commands you to.
In which case, you better listen...lest God smite you down for disobedience. Speaking for a friend...

The truth is, if I saw that man whom I was married to before, I would likely give him and his new someone a big hug. Starting with the new someone! I mean, what a blessing that trial was to my life, and so much gratitude fills my heart every day with how much I learned, how it shaped me, and who I am now because of it. It literally PURGED me of my worst qualities. I doubt there was another way for that to happen. I know God brought that man and I together for a reason, and I know He commanded us to be apart for a reason. He sees all, the Great Picture. He knew what we were to become but that we had to go through some fiery furnaces to get there.

“Divorce” is not a French delicacy.
No, it’s more like a rotten, fermented, pungent potatoe salad that’s been left out in the heat for weeks.
Yet, somehow for me, it was the most shape-shifting, soul-stretching, and Faith-building experience. It’s like the rhubarb pie, nobody wants to get it cause it sounds weird but it’s really the most delicious!
I can see how the Lord used that time in my life to fulfill His purpose, to guide me along to the place He would have me be, to who He wants me to be.
I’ve had so many instances happen where I was like, “Oh! That’s why He sent me on that rugged journey!” That’s how He taught me to listen to the spirit, to repent, to feel compassion, to not judge.
The Lord’s timing is perfect. I have full trust that the Lord has worked miracles in both of our lives, and that our families have also grown spiritually. I pray for them, and have no regrets other than I wish I could ask them to their faces to forgive me of my shortcomings. Life is so sweet and not long enough. 

In other news. Preparing for an ETERNAL marriage is something quite extraordinary.
It is the exact opposite of divorce, but virtually as shape-shifting.
Nothing has terrified me more.
Nothing has caused me to stay up late reading and reading and searching the scriptures.
I am so excited to be with my children forever.
There is no doubt in my mind this is what God wants me to do, but getting enough courage to stand without shaking in that room will take all of my energy.
Any tips!?!?