Thursday, August 11, 2016

52 Weeks of Gratitude Challenge: Week 31

Well, week 31...what do you have for me?
Bahah...hate to be a nag, but I hope it's good.

If you've followed my posts, you know I struggle with intense anxiety and mild depression. I will not excuse the behaviors as simply "genetic", although some of it may be. I refuse to let that hinder my search for growth and recovery. Nothing will be a crutch, and quite honestly I'm more annoyed by my anxiety than anyone else-trust me.

So this leads me to the prompt for week 31 of the 52 Weeks of Gratitude Challenge.
Core value!!!

I'm going to pick HONESTY.
Because, well, honesty. Period.

I pride myself on being an honest human. I am the worlds worst liar, but I also suffer insane guilt if I even slightly twist a truth. I've thrown surprise birthday parties before and lied about what we were doing that day, and it kept me up at night. I also felt bad lying to people when they asked if I was pregnant with my second baby...obviously, my stomach was showing! And I was running to the bathroom every hour. But I wasn't ready to announce it yet, and the lies made me feel bad. 
Worlds Honest Human Award goes to....Brittany!

At the same time, I think sometimes my honesty is a bugger, for I am honest to a fault. I have no filter, therefore what I say is often inappropriate or offensive. I'll throw in "hilarious" too, because I think my honesty is pretty funny. But it can also be painful, especially to those who don't want to hear the truth.

This week I am grateful for my core value of honesty. 
I would so much rather be known for telling the truth than for being a "yes man." I've met many a "yes man" in my day...and seriously, I wonder how they sleep at night. How they transition from one human to the next, depending on their audience. They will say whatever the recipient wants to hear, and they know exactly how to blend into a conversation to benefit their circumstances. I'm not sure this is a good skill. It makes a person dishonest. They are lacking that CORE value. I find this kind of person a challenge to deal with. I never know if I can trust a thing they say or do, especially when they say/do one thing for me and an entirely different one five minutes later for someone else.

Anyway, I don't mean to sound negative. Let's get back on track.
I am grateful this week for being honest. It's my favorite core value. I hope it always stays with me. 
And that concludes week 31 for the 52 weeks of gratitude challenge.
By Brittany Shannon